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COVID19 Shows That Home May Not Be A Safe Space For Some

How many deaths will we rule Covid19 related, even though they tested negative to the virus?

Feeling safe is a fundamental human need. That is why we are drawn to and thrive in spaces where we feel safe and accepted with our human flaws.

Children and adults alike need safe spaces in order to develop into a mature emotional and mental intelligence. So we seek these spaces all our lives.

We adapt to different environments in the best way we can. For many the demand of daily life has become a safety net.

This was a way to exist fully in the different settings that demand a different part of us. In this sense each part of our personalities is performative.

One moment you are a student speaking to a teacher. The next you are an employee. The next you are a mother or a customer at the supermarket.

No matter what roles you played in your daily life. The one surety now is that you are limited to those roles which define what home is.

What if this is your least favourite role? That home is toxic for you and your loved ones?

There is a recorded 25% increase in calls made to report domestic abuse in the UK. The Refuge recorded a 700% increase in women calling their help line number during the Covid19 shutdown.

This paints a rather frightening picture of what really goes on behind closed doors. Especially now that all our doors must remain shut for perhaps the longest period in most of our lifetimes.

We need be paying attention to what the shutdown is revealing to us. To think about how many women and children are engulfed by fear of their own homes.

How many women have tried to sneak off into dark rooms to secretly dial 999. How many phones have been grabbed and turned off or thrown against walls. Mid dialling the Refuge helpline 0808 2000 247.

What about the one caught sneaking out? The one who is working from home with a bruise on her face, hoping there will be no virtual meetings on Skype or Zoom.

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What of the children? That must sit and watch television whilst counting how many beers their parents are gulping down? Praying that they fall asleep soon?

The children who have no real home. To whom school was the only escape. Are they hiding under the bed from the bullies?

The same bullies who pretend to be friends when adults are around? Do they play hide and seek? How long can they really hide?

The first and second day maybe? What about day 13? When she drops a plate at the sound of his voice?Or she tires of the abuse and decides to fight back?

What about the one who will seek comfort at the bottom end of that whisky bottle? Or the ones who will swallow more sleeping pills than they should?

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How many deaths will we rule Covid19 related, even though they tested negative to the virus? And the ones whose bodies we will never find? The ones buried deep in their own backyards or unfinished construction sites?

The Coronavirus put all our activities to a stop. So that we can maybe look at the mess that we have been ignoring for too long.

 

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